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2004 in Memoriam A Eulogy Writ Large by the Reverend Mark W. Christian Presented to the First Unitarian Church of Oklahoma City Sunday January 2, 2005
Reading Indonesian Tsunami Response William Sinkford—President of the Unitarian Universalist Association
The Indian Ocean tsunami reminds us all how precious life is and how quickly life can end. As the death toll continues to climb, the Unitarian Universalist Service Committee ( http://www.uusc.org ) and the Unitarian Universalist Association are working together to collect funds for disaster relief and to speed them to the Indian Ocean countries most affected by this immense tragedy. I urge you to be generous in your giving so we can do as much as possible to relieve the suffering of the survivors. The money you donate will be channeled by the UUSC to its partner organizations in tsunami-affected countries in the region and by the UUA's Holdeen India program to on-the-ground indigenous partner organizations in India. I grieve this loss of
life, especially the deaths of so many children. My prayers and condolences
go out to the survivors and their families. I trust that Unitarian
Universalists will take this opportunity to demonstrate our compassion for
the people who must now begin the grim task of rebuilding their lives from
the ruins left in the wake of this horrendous natural disaster. And I pray
that we all recognize again that our lives are a precious gift.
Prayer and Mediation “These Were Royal Hearted, Rare” John Haynes Holmes
Death this year has taken (them) Whose kind we shall not see again. Pride and skill and friendliness, Wrath and wisdom and delight, Are shining still, but shining less, And clouded to the common sight. Time will show them clear again. Time will give us other(s then) With names to write in burning gold When they are great and we are old, But these were royal-hearted, rare. Memory keeps with loving care Deeds they did and tales they told. But (the) living (they) are hard to spare.
2004 in Memoriam A Sermon by the Reverend Mark W. Christian Delivered to the First Unitarian Church of Oklahoma City Sunday January 2, 2005
We gather this day in the presence of death But we gather neither in fear nor praise of death We gather the Spirit and things of the Spirit As revealed to us in the lives of those who are dead but not forgotten.
In the presence of Life we say “No” to Death In the presence of Death we say “Yes” to Life.
It has come to be a tradition for me to set aside the first Sunday of each New Year for a kind of mass Memorial Service for those who have died in the preceding twelve months. My purpose is two-fold—one is straightforward, I wish to plumb the lives of those who have died for the elements of the eternal and divine that were manifested in their lives so that we, the living, may gain insight and inspiration for days which lay before us. The other goal I have this morning is to share something of our approach to death and dying—and thus, in relief, life and living—with those who may be new among us. I have discovered that Memorial Services in our tradition are among our most unique and moving services. Much of what we are about today is summed up in those words that I just shared with you. I use them in each Memorial Service I conduct. We gather this day in the presence of death But we gather neither in fear nor praise of death We gather the Spirit and things of the Spirit As revealed to us in the lives of those who are dead but not forgotten. In the presence of Life we say “No” to Death In the presence of Death we say “Yes” to Life. Of course when I use those words to bracket an actual Memorial Service I insert the person’s name where today I said “of those who are dead but not forgotten.” Of the many offices of minister in this church, I get more comments about Memorial Services than anything else. I attribute this more to our tradition’s approach to Life, Living and Memory over speculation about Heaven and Hell than to any particular skill I possess. Our Memorial Services tend to be honest and connect with people in ways that makes them recognize the gift of Life as opposed to the promise of heaven. When I conduct Memorial Services, I try not to use phrases like passed away or crossed over—there is a power and reality of the word death, which should not be sold short. When death is before us, I believe we should speak of death. We do not speak of sleep or eternal life when death is before us. We speak of death. I also tend not to speculate on heaven, hell or the final disposition of souls in Memorial Services. One of the things that I find most enduring about our approach to religion is that we consistently focus on this Life. We ask: “How shall we live this life? How shall we make the most of the gifts we have been given? How shall we respond to life’s adversities?” I don’t believe you can say, as I do, that religion should not turn life into a dress rehearsal and then change directions at the end. Since we say that religion should not ask us to live this life in lieu of something that comes later and then how can we come to the end only to worry about heaven and hell or reincarnation. On these issues, I remain profoundly agnostic. I have no ability to gauge the merits or speculate about what happens after we live—so therefore I believe we should live our lives free of worry about such things. We are given a gift called life and our task is a mortal one—to live into the fullness of life’s possibilities. Religion is quite that simple to me. I shall not sing a different tune when it comes time for a memorial service. There is, though, something profoundly different and profoundly important when we gather together “in the presence of death.” Someone, much more learned than I, once observed that we have religion because we face the challenge of living our lives in the realization that one-day we shall die. If Life is real then so, too, is Death. We cannot steal from death any more than we should cheat life—so as a religious body we gather to acknowledge the reality of death while celebrating the preciousness of life. That is what our Memorial Services are about.
Each year, I set aside this Sunday for a remembering—remembering the preciousness of Life by acknowledging the reality of death. For many of us the reality of death, today, takes us immediately to Indonesia. So let us acknowledge together the human tragedy wrought by the natural forces of a tsunami. The death total is at, or surpassing, 150 thousand. These dead are mostly nameless to us—but each of them was known to someone, someone who grieves this day. Death on this scale from an unpredictable source elicits in us sadness and compassion. It also should elicit an appreciation for the preciousness of life.
Many people died this year who reflect a piece of the human condition, good and evil, in ways that many of us can understand. Let us now consider those who died in 2004. For lack of a better way to consider so many people from so many walks of life—I offer these names alphabetically. · Abu Abas—former leader of the Palestinian Liberation Front died from natural causes in U.S. Custody. He was 55 and was taken prisoner by U.S. forces in Iraq in 2003. · Yassir Arafat died at 75 in Paris. The leader of the Palestinian Liberation Organization was considered both a statesman and a terrorist. He was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize in 1994 along with Shimon Peres and Yitzhak Rabin for an Israeli/Palestinian Peace Accord. The accord has yet to succeed in ending violent conflict. The Israeli Army confined Araft to the PLO headquarters in Ramalah for many years. · Photographer Richard Avadon died October 1. He was 81. His dramatic, stark, photos were mainstays in Harper’s Bazaar, Vogue and The New Yorker. · Jan Berry of Jan and Dean fame died at 62. He suffered paralysis and a brain injury after a 1966 automobile accident. · Actor Marlon Brando died in July. He was 80. Brando had a long and distinguished career, but 1972’s release of “The Godfather” and “Last Tango in Paris” were perhaps his crescendo. We won the Best Actor award for Last Tango—but declined the honor in protest of Hollywood’s portrayal and treatment of Native Americans. · Richard Butler, the white supremacist who established the Aryan Nations in the 1970s, died at 86. · Quite the opposite legacy is left by Ray Charles. His music seemed to transcend race, combining gospel, blues, pop, country, and jazz. He died June 10 at age 73. Charles won 12 Grammy’s and is known for his rendition of Georgia on My Mind and America the Beautiful. When Ray Charles sang America the Beautiful he always began with what is usually the third verse— O beautiful for heroes proved
In liberating strife.
Ray Charles’s blindness, his battle with alcoholism, heroin addiction and infidelity are prominently portrayed in a current bio-pic. In Ray Charles, perhaps, we can consider the full sweep of humanity—good and ill, joyous and tragic. · “The French Chef,” Julia Child died at 91. Her propensity to use butter, cream and other rich ingredients has fallen from favor (if not flavor) these days—but few would fail to acknowledge Julia Child as the foremother of today’s many cooking shows. · Another PBS mainstay—Allister Cooke died this year at 95. He hosted Masterpiece Theatre from 1971-1992. He also hosted the BBC radio series “Letters from America” from 1946-2002. · Oklahoman Gordon “Gordo” Cooper died in October at 77. He was one the original Mercury Seven astronauts. · Watergate Special Prosecutor Archibald Cox died in May. He was 92. · Let’s pause for a moment to offer some respect to Rodney Dangerfield. The comedian was 82. · Jacques Derrida, the French Deconstructionist died in October in Paris. He was 74. His controversial writings ushered in Post-modernism by arguing that all broadly philosophical claims have meaning only in the system of competing and opposing possibilities they wish to transcend. In a radio interview I heard following his death he was said to have claimed that the only two realities that can’t be deconstructed are Oil and Jerusalem. No one can use virtual oil and no one will settle for anything less than the real Jerusalem. · “Da da da da. Da da da da.” Offered for your consideration, Jerry Goldsmith, the man who wrote the theme music to the Twilight Zone and scored many movies. He was 75. · One of the original MTV “Vee-Jays” died last year. J.J. Jackson was 62. · Rick James—the Super Freak—died at 56. He pioneered “Punk Funk” music in the 1970s and 80s. · Samuel Johnson—of floor wax fame—died at 76. His company also manufactures and markets Raid and Off. · Bob Keeshan—better known as…Captain Kangaroo died in January at 76. Starting in 1955 he, Mister Moose, Bunny Rabbit, Mister Green Jeans and a plethora of ping pong balls entertained America’s youth. Prior to becoming Captain Kangaroo he created Clarabell the Clown on the Howdy Doody Show. His commitment to Children Television cleared the way for Sesame Street and a whole cast of Educational TV offerings. · Elizabeth Kubler-Ross died at age 78 this year. It is very likely that without her pioneering book “On Death and Dying,” I today’s sermon would not be a time for remembering those who died last year. Her analysis that there are stages of grief that all persons experience has proved profoundly helpful to many people in times of loss. · Entrepreneur Estée Lauder died at 97. Her line of Department Store Cosmetics grew into a multi-billion dollar industry. · Actress Janet Leigh died in October. I suspect she preferred baths to showers after shooting the famous scene from Psycho. · Historian William Manchester died at age 82. His biographies of political and military leaders capture large portions of the human condition. His book on the Kennedy Assassination, “The Death of a President” is considered a classic. My favorite of his books is “A World Lit Only by Fire” which analyzes the emergence of the Renaissance, the Enlightenment and much of what is called Modernity. · Polish Essayist and Poet Czlaw Milosz won the Nobel Prize for Literature in 1980. His early work focused on the atrocities of World War II. Later he turned his pen toward the oppression of intellectuals by totalitarian regimes. · Jerry Orbach—who for the last 12 years has portrayed Lennie Briscoe on NBC’s “Law and Order” died of prostate cancer last week. Orbach had a long career in Broadway Musicals before portraying detective Briscoe. · Jack Paar, host of the Tonight Show from 1957-1962, died at 82. · Actor Robert Pastorelli, best known for his quirky character Eldin the house painter on TV’s Murphy Brown, died at 49. He also appeared in Dances with Wolves, Michael and Get Shorty. · Tulsan Tony Randall—Felix from TV’s Odd Couple died at 84 in May. Randall had a long career on stage and screen before portraying the obsessive compulsive photographer opposite Jack Klugman. · Ronald Reagan. I almost believe nothing more needs to or should be said. Reagan redefined American politics and in some ways resurrected conservatism starting in the California State House and then as our nation’s 40th President. His long career as an actor and announcer gave him a set of political skills that led him to be called “The Great Communicator.” Reagan had his thumb on the pulse of the nation and was instrumental in ending the Cold War. Reagan was profoundly optimistic about our nation in a way that still inspires today. · Christopher Reeve—Superman. More than Superman on film in many ways he embodied the ethos of the Man of Steel more after his horseback riding accident that confined him to a wheelchair. He was tireless in his advocacy of Stem Cell research. Reeve was a Unitarian and my colleague who conducted his Memorial Service comments on the depth of Reeve’s compassion, humility and humanity. · Pierre Salinger—the award winning journalist and Press Secretary in the Kennedy White House died at 79. · Actress Isabell Sanford, who portrayed Louise Jefferson in Norman Leher’s show “The Jeffersons” died at 86. · Marge Schott the controversial former owner of the Cincinnati Reds died at 92. Her downfall as a sports owner began when reports accurately cited her use of racial and ethnic slurs when referring to players. · Former NFL Defensive Back Pat Tillman died in battle in Iraq in April. Tillman’s willingness to give up a multi-million dollar NFL career to enlist in the US armed forces is in no way sullied by revelations that he was killed in a tragic friendly fire incident. Those are among the list of some of the famous and infamous who died last year. The list is by definition incomplete and subjective—but I hope it portrays something of the breadth of the human condition. 2004 also saw the death of a number of persons with direct connection to this church. Today let us honor the life of these people. They were loved and we remember them.
Gary Parsons It is likely that each of us gathered here today suffered the loss of someone near to us in 2004. As we pause in silence to honor these memories, if you so desire, feel free to whisper the name of someone who died last year that you wish to remember. We gather this day in the presence of death But we gather neither in fear nor praise of death We gather the Spirit and things of the Spirit As revealed to us in the lives of those who are dead but not forgotten. In the presence of Life we say “No” to Death In the presence of Death we say “Yes” to Life. AMEN
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